This is a call-out to someone who has influence over the executives at Disney. Could you tell them to stop green-lighting these live-action remakes of their classic animations? They are ruining a legacy that has had over 100 years of quality entertainment for the family. By creating these monstrosities like The Lion King, Pinocchio and now Snow White (or Disney’s Snow White, so as not to be confused with any other dire reboot), they are destroying childhoods who were brought up on those great features where you could see that a lot of love and attention was poured into them by true talent, and not just a way to trick people into spending their hard-earned cash for films lacking in heart, passion and a longing to be magical.

Snow White, named after being born in a snowstorm, lives happily with her mother and father until her mother dies. Her father remarries, and while going off to war, he disappears, presumed dead. Snow White’s stepmother is now the woman who rules the land, and she keeps Snow White from the outside world by making her do chores. When her magic mirror tells her that Snow White is the fairest of them all, she sends her to the forest to be killed but is let free by the huntsman; where Snow comes across a cottage belonging to miners and a gang of bandits who want the queen stopped.

Honestly, I don’t know where to start with this one. Suffering from a troubled production, Marc Webb’s film is mostly a mess, trying to be more than one thing and ending up being a pale imitation of the classic 1937 original. There are original songs from the same team who wrote The Greatest Showman, and I must admit, they are memorable, mainly because they sound exactly like the ones found in the Hugh Jackman musical. The choreography by Mandy Moore, who produced the dances in La La Land, is full of energy. Still, you are given little opportunity to enjoy them with close-ups and some dubious editing decisions.

The production designs are pleasing and reminiscent of those in the original. They include a far too brief dark forest with trees that seem alive, which leads to the cute and cuddly animals that come to protect the princess. Even the dwarves’ cottage is nicely realised, which leads to problem number two.

Rumours stated that the dwarves were replaced by CGI versions due to complaints about using actors of diminished size and disrespecting them as these were the only parts they could play. This turned out to be untrue, and the idea was to use CGI from the outset. However, these creations are incredibly creepy. Snow White has always been regarded as one of the horror films, but that was because of the Wicked Queen, not the weirdly looking dwarves. They still have the same names as the original, but they just look like serial killers. Then there is Dopey. Always a favourite with those who love the 30s movie, but here he is no longer the dopey character but someone wholly misunderstood. What happens at the end with the character is almost unforgivable!

Maybe the performances are the saving grace. Well, almost. As the Queen, Gal Gadot, Wonder Woman, is a disaster. She isn’t the best actress around, but her flaws are on show here. She lacks absolute terror; she struggles with the songs, and you find yourself sinking into your seat every time she appears. Thankfully, Rachel Zegler is the saving grace. As Snow White, she gives the character some depth; she is not just a damsel in distress but a feisty young woman who can stand on her own two feet. She gives her all in the musical numbers, and if it wasn’t for her, this would have been the bottom-of-the-barrel stuff.

Disney’s Snow lacks everything you would expect from a fairy tale. There is no charm, no warmth, no magic. It lumps along with songs that don’t come close to Whistle While You Work or Heigh-Ho (both appear with new lyrics). It’s dull and poorly produced; if anything, Disney should hang its head in shame. However, there’s no stopping them. Up next is Lilo and Stitch, and then Moana. Please. No more.

1 out of 5

Director: Marc Webb

Starring: Rachel Zegler, Gal Gadot, Andrew Burnap, Emilia Faucher, Ansu Kabia, Jeremy Swift, Andrew Barth Feldman, Tituss Burgess, Martin Klebba

Written by: Erin Cressida Wilson and (based on the fairy tale) The Brothers Grimm

Running Time: 109 mins

Cert: PG

Re;ease date: 21st March 2025